Ashton Kutcher just blessed the world with an acceptance speech that has everyone talking. He’s not just a pretty face folks; he actually knows what he’s talking about. A big thing that stuck out to me is when he described how to be sexy: Be smart, be thoughtful, be generous. He gave this speech at the Teen Choice Awards and I sure hope those teens listened, but all women (young and old) need to hear his words too.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: Sexiness is less about how you look and more about how you carry yourself. It’s less about the size of your boobs and more about the size of your brain. Our generation of women has been cultivated in an air-brushed society that places more importance on a nice ass than a nice personality and despite campaigns around the world to change this, it still seems way too prominent.

Maybe it’s human nature to cringe at cellulite and maybe it’s an innate trait that we shy away from a less-symmetrical face or maybe we’re all just idiots who place more importance on looks than the good in people. All I know is that if you are a good person with brains in your head then it really doesn’t matter what you look like because eventually people will see how sexy you really are.

If you are happy you will shine. People will notice your smile and that scar on your forehead won’t matter because the sun will be shining out of your mouth and blinding them from all those little “flaws” that only you can see. If you are kind and you help others for no other reason than to see them smile or make their day easier; then you are sexy. When you hold the door for a stranger, you pass them by for a moment in time, and they will never remember that your nose is crooked but they will remember how you helped them out and made them feel. This is what matters people.

Some of the sexiest people alive are not the most beautiful, but because they are confident in their own skin we see them in a special light. They glow. They project sexiness in their walk, their talk, their mannerisms. It’s not hard to be sexy, what’s really hard is to be confident. If you love yourself the rest of the world will love you back tenfold. Easier said than done, I know, but that’s where being smart comes in.

If you are smart you can be anything you want to be, including sexy. It’s not even just about being book smart, it’s about being people smart; life smart. It’s about knowing who you are and knowing what you want and being able to put your plans into action and take charge of your own life. Being smart is less about acing trigonometry and more about knowing the angles of life. Knowing how to work what God gave you and rock it. Once you ace that shit, you’ll be golden.

Of course it’s harder than it seems to get into the sexy mindset, especially if you’ve been living your life believing you’re only mediocre. You can be the smartest, kindest, most loving and thoughtful person in the universe but if you don’t believe you are sexy then my words (and Ashton’s words) can’t truly help you until you start realizing you are worth it. You are sexy. You are loved.

Be you. Be sexy.
The Love Hawk