I’ve been noticing a certain type of pandemonium infecting most twenty and thirty-somethings these days. The ones who aren’t married or in a serious relationship are running all over town in their high heels, frequenting night clubs or dating sites, trying to find their perfect man. Well, settle down ladies. Chances are you already know the guy you’re gonna end up with, so stop breaking your back trying to find “Mr. Right” when “Mr. Right in Front of You” is, well—right in front of you.
I don’t have stats to back this up. I haven’t done a scientific study or even googled the odds of ending up with someone you already know, but from what I’ve seen recently it seems pretty legit. It makes sense too. Maybe it’s an old acquaintance from high school, the guy who sat two rows back in History class and who you hung out with a few times in grade 10. Maybe it’s an old friend (or flame) from the Summer Camp you’re parents made you go to when you were 15 (and way too cool for Camp). Maybe it’s your first kiss or your secret high school crush or the guy you briefly dated during freshman year in university. The point is: these people knew you, before you were the YOU you are now. So, it’s really not that hard to connect.
This isn’t to say you can’t live happily ever after with an awesome guy you don’t have a past with. It is not impossible that you’ll meet your future husband through a friend of a friend, or at the bar after too many Gin & 7’s, these things happen all the time. The point here is that your next boyfriend might be right around the corner. Maybe you talk to him everyday or maybe only every couple of months, but he’s in your life and if he’s meant to stay, you gotta make it happen.
If there’s a guy you keep running into or who crosses your mind every once in a while and you think “What if?” don’t sit back and wait for the stars to align. You gotta stand up and make plans. Since you know him outside of the dating realm it probably wouldn’t be weird for you to ask him to go out for a beer sometime. Since you’ll have a shared past and something in common it won’t be hard for you guys to break into an easy conversation. If you leave the night with a smile on your face and a few butterflies in your stomach then meet up again. If you leave with a slight buzz and a sense of “He’s not who I thought he was” then head the other way and maybe another boy from your past will be sitting on that road ahead just waiting to be picked up.
The point here is: Sometimes the ones we’re meant to be with are staring us point blank in the face. Sometimes we know and try to avoid it, other times we just need a little shove. This is your shove. I know this because I needed that shove once too. I ended up marrying my best friend who I’ve known since grade one. It took years of friendship until one day it clicked and I realized, why do I want to get to know anyone else when the only guy I want to talk to for the rest of my life is the one I’m talking to on the phone right now?
So, maybe you have thought about the boys of your past and if you’d end up with one of them. Maybe not. Maybe you’ll run into that guy from History class at a coffee shop tomorrow. I don’t know your situation but if all you need is a shove in the right direction, consider this a major kick in the ass. Go get him!
The Love Hawk