What 90’s Pop Taught Us About Relationships

90s collageEveryone loved the ‘90s. It was a decade full of Doc Martins, overalls, blow-up furniture, and Bubblegum Pop. We wore wide leg jeans and platform running shoes and we crimped our hair, but nothing finished our look better than knowing all the words to our favourite songs. 90’s music taught us more than we even realized. These songs were our personal tutors, our life coaches. Let’s hope that memorizing every lyric from our CD inserts paid off. These are the songs we still know every word to; the songs that the kids of the Baby Boom Echo couldn’t get enough of at those awkward school dances. These songs helped define a whole generation, they define who we are and most of all, how we view relationships. Here are a few things 90’s pop taught us about the dating life:

 Don’t Date Losers (No Scrubs- TLC, 1999)

“Cuz I’m lookin’ like class and he’s lookin’ like trash. Can’t get wit’ no deadbeat ass”

TLC taught us a valuable lesson in ’99: Don’t date guys who think they’re cool but really have nothing to back that coolness up with.  If he has no money, no car, and no game well we don’t want him!  Considering some of us were 12-15 years old at this time, our pool of boys all had no money, no cars and definitely no game but as the song followed us into the future we realized TLC was right! Not settling for guys who can’t fend for themselves, doesn’t mean we have to be gold diggers but the men we date should have something going for them.

Some Guys Really Do Care (I Swear- All-4-One, 1994)

“’Cause I stand beside you through the years, you’ll only cry those happy tears. And though I make mistakes, I’ll never break your heart”

This song really got our hopes up that great men exist. We learned from an early age that when a man really, truly loves us he won’t ever hurt us. While this is true, it seems that girls think that every guy they date will be their prince charming. Newsflash: If he’s an asshole, he’ll always be an asshole. If he really loves you he will never let you go (especially if he swears he won’t).

You Need Friend Approval (Wannabe- Spice Girls, 1996)

“If you wanna be my lover, you gotta get with my friends. Make it last forever friendship never ends”

Friendship is important and you really should make sure your girls approve of the guy you’re gonna “Zigazigah” (AKA Sleep with). Sometimes they won’t approve and you may be like “What the hell?” but sometimes our friends can see the flaws in a bad guy long before we can. Let’s be honest though, everyone has Zigazigah-ed without their friend’s approval. The Spice Girls did get it right though: If you want something lasting better make sure everyone gets along.

Girls Have to Give a Bit Too (Where’s The Love- Hanson, 1997)

“Something has been going on and I don’t know what it is
You don’t mind the taking girl, but you don’t know how to give”

While MmmBop was way over played, most people forget about this little gem. Where’s The Love taught us that if you are a bitch and treat your guy like shit, he will eventually have enough and leave you. It showed us that we need to appreciate the good guys in our lives and not take advantage of them.

Liking Someone Can Make You Nutty (You Drive Me Crazy- Britney Spears, 1999)

“You Drive me crazy, I just can’t sleep, I’m so excited, I’m in too deep. 
Ohh…Crazy, But it feels alright. Baby, thinkin’ of you keeps me up all night”

How many times have you lost sleep, tossing and turning thinking about the guy you like? It’s nice to know Brit Brit has also been there (although she was being driven crazy by Justin Timberlake and his ramen noodle hair in ‘99). It’s always fun at the beginning of a relationship when you’re so into that person you actually can’t sleep. This usually determines how into someone we are: If we like them so much that we can’t get them off our minds, well then it surely must be the real deal!

You Can Do No Wrong, If He Really Likes You (As Long As You Love Me- Backstreet Boys 1997)

“Every little thing that you have said and done, Feels like it’s deep within me
Doesn’t really matter if you’re on the run, It seems like we’re meant to be”

This song always got me thinking. Soo, if a guy really likes me I can be on the LAM and he’ll stick by me? It’s kind of like Bonnie and Clyde, no? BSB made it clear that if a guy likes a girl enough nothing will stop him from being with her. It’s a nice thought, but I dunno. This girl BSB wanted, she seemed a bit sketchy right? They didn’t care who she was, where she was from, what she had done…. If this song taught us anything it’s that we can all be criminals as long as we really love our men. Not the best lesson but a great song nonetheless!

Breaks-Ups Suck and Guys Have Feelings Too (End of the Road- Boys II Men, 1992)

“Although we’ve come to the End of the Road, Still I can’t let you go
It’s unnatural, you belong to me, I belong to you”

To see grown men showing so much emotion through song allowed us to understand that real men have feelings. This song pulled (and still pulls) at everyone’s heart strings because it really encompasses how hard breakups are. It taught us that losing the one you love hurts more than anything and that sometimes you just can’t move on for while. We’ve all been hurt; Boys II Men showed us that it’s okay to cry.

So, basically, everything we know about relationships in adulthood can be attributed to the great music of the 90s. These songs had heart, they had soul, they taught us the fundamentals of the dating scene and for that we should all be grateful to the best music of our lives, the music of our generation. Thank you 90s for making me so savvy in the love department.

Your Ultimate 90’s Girl,
The Love Hawk

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